Aatmiyoswajon - The True Relations

Aatmyioswajon - A beautiful play that Ma and I watched yesterday.. Ma has not gone anywhere over the last 14 months except to hospitals, doctor visits, funeral of her dearest sister, or that shraddh ceremony.. Her life revolves around Baba's nurses, his diet, his Ryle's tube feeding, his catheter.. her pleasures these days are a few words from Baba or Baba orally having a little bit to eat..

My friend Sujoy Prasad Chatterjee has been staging this play over the last year or so, maybe just after the period when Baba fell sick.. So we did not have the fortune of watching this play.. together..

This time, when I heard that Aatmiyoswajon was about to be staged at the Academy of Fine Arts, I had an urge of watching it and taking Ma with me.. She needs to live.. We all need to live.. so that we can look after Baba untiringly.. so that we can handle the depressing situations without getting frustrated..

I am thankful that I chose to go.. Firstly because, it is a touching play that moves us from the very core.. Wonderful performances from Dolly Basu, Saumya Sengupta, and Sujoy.. overall a lovable production..

It is about those people who are not our blood-relations.. not our sons, or brothers, not our daughters or sisters.. It is about those people who care for us and love us despite not being genetically connected to us.. The driver who comes on a day when the city is standstill due to storm and rain that stops the son from visiting the mother.. The driver who brings hot jalebis for "Madam" on a day like that.. the driver who empathizes with "Madam" more than his son can imagine to do.. The way the Madam, outwardly very strict, teaches the driver to read, with affection..The way the driver pats Madam's head softly when she gets her first attack of dementia.. The way the driver does not forget to bring Bijoya-r Mishti to Madam when she is in asylum, while the son is busy in doing the important job of clearing the bills..

More than once, my throat ached as I was reminded again and again of what Sejomasi's caregivers in the old-age home told us after her death.. She had asked for laau-chingri and some other kind of fish.. and they had kindly brought that for her from their home.. they, the Aatmiyoswajon, the real ones, when we the fake blood-related ones were busy with our own lives, some tired after taking care of her for three weeks, and some doing our duty by just buying her bread and milk.. I, myself, know the value of Aatmiyoswajon because I, fortunately have a few, some who love me despite never having a blood or legal relation and some who .. well ...

We could not meet you Sujoy last evening, as it was quite late and Ma had to return far off.. She asked me to convey her love.. Bear Hugs to you.. and very very special and warm regards to Dolly Basu and Saumya Sengupta.. I will never be able to imagine that "Laalu" and his "Madam" are fictional.. they entered my heart, forever.. their expressions and appearances etched in my soul.. It will be incomplete if I do not mention the sound designer who created such apt sounds of the car being driven, and the other sounds needed for the ambiance. 

— at Academy of Fine Arts.

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Just A Date

Just a Date

August 6, 2014

Overcast Sky.

August Morning.

Constant Breeze,

with a downpour-

Flight to board

to meet his kin.

August 6, 2011.

Reached.

Met.

Smiles galore.

Relief.

Blessings for a knot to be tied.

Dreams to come true. Finally.

An yellow Envelope.

The address of my lawyer.

The address of his lawyer.

Sheets of typed paper.

I hold them.

August 6, 2014.

I get to see the papers. 

The knot is untied.

Torn, so to say.

I read those words.

Those words.

They will sink in, someday.

Someday. Finally. 

Aparajita Tumi - June 10, 2015

AN intriguing movie that I had the fortune of at last watching yesterday!! Loved the actors (somehow only Prosenjit Chatterjee was a misfit) and actresses! Such ease, elegance, and elan with which they ruled the scenes.. I had no idea that it was directed by ANiruddha Roychoudhury, but then I began to sense it, having watched Antaheen just an hour back.. After almost a day and almost no sleep, I am unable to get over the movie.. These two new actresses are so so good! and Indranil Sengupta again! Just when I was cherishing the beautiful songs of Antaheen and feeling thankful for Shantanu Moitra and Anindya and Chandril, I was again treated by this deluge of lyrical music that Aparajita Tumi offers through this trio and through singers like Rupankar!

My family had watched this movie in Jan 2012 in the theater, celebrating my parents' anniv, when I was not here.. Last night, I watched it alone, with nobody around, till 2-40 am.. It was as if a whole circle became complete! Thanks Zee Bangla Cinema!

Antaheen Apekkha - Endless Wait

He has not touched his movie player and his DVD-VCD cabinet for more than 13 months now! Baba, an avid movie-watcher, would at times drive us crazy by not being able to control the surround-sound volume levels and by watching Yes, Prime Minister or Titli (although my favorite, but you cannot watch it on a Monday and again on a Friday, can you? :P) again and again!
In the topsy-turvy of the last one year, the home theater had also got disconnected somehow and never has the situation allowed me to relax enough to touch the home movie corner.
Last night, when I had no work and the TV failed to offer anything interesting, I opened the DVD cabinet. Yeah, it required a bit of dusting, most of which still remains to be done. The remote had slipped and fallen somewhere and I had to spend 20 minutes just finding it! The categories in which Baba kept his movies- Satyajit Ray shelf, Rituparno shelf, and so on, had gotten jumbled up.. I tried to put things into their respective places. Then I chose Antaheen and Khela.
Antaheen is a movie that Baba loves! I have seen him watching the movie many a time, always getting emotional in the end. I have never watched the entire film at one go -- only caught bits and pieces while Baba watched! Yesterday, I thought of watching Antaheen, almost in a quest to understand why my father loved it so much!
From the earlier glimpses, I had the idea that Aparna Sen and Kalyan Ray play an estranged couple who still care for each other deeply. I was a different "I" then. I am a different "I" now. The way I understood each little nuance of their estrangement and love, yesterday, was like never before. I know what it is to be like that, now. To be not-together, but, .. a million things that still keep you together! Beautiful acting by Radhika Apte and Rahul Bose, Kalyan Ray and Aparna Sen, Saswati Guhathakurta and Sharmila Tagore, and Meeta VashishTh, make this movie so brilliant! And the pain that engulfs the heart at the end is so addictive! Shantanu Moitra , Anindya, Chandril make the songs a pleasure and a salute to the cinematographer too. As the movie ended, I remembered Baba saying " O bujhte pere gechhilo thik sedin i" referring to Vrinda recognizing Aveek to be the Boy in the Box, "kintu o bujhlo por e" referring to Aveek understanding it only after Vrinda's death!

Yes, Baba, you were right. I missed you while watching the movie last night, as the surround sound vibrated the windows and I remembered how we used to get angry with you. Thank You Baba, for gifting us a huge Movie Collection, and a vast Music CD library! I still hope you will get well, and we will again watch movies together, just as I told you today! I am waiting to watch Sonar Kella with you, again!